Judy Kucharuk: Before you get married, have a spelling bee

judy

Nothing slows traffic like a misspelled highway sign. You wonder if they did it purposely or if someone just made a boo-boo.

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The month of June is the best time to take that evening drive and go sign watching — similar to bird watching except that the signs don’t move and are therefore easier to spot. Why June? Because June is the perfect month to spot signs that declare that ‘Congradulations’ are in order for the local high-school graduates. 

I have to wonder if it’s an intentional play on the word, or if the sign installer believes that is the correct spelling. 

Does anyone else mentally spellcheck highway signage? What about Facebook posts – do you find yourself snorting your morning coffee after reading a Facebook post littered with spelling errors?

No? It’s just me?

Before you start chastising me — “But Judy, your grammar is terrible!” — I will admit that my grammar is not always up to par. I over punctuate, have difficulty with word contractions, and I am certain that my schoolteacher grandmother is looking down from Heaven and shaking her head in disappointment. 

Irregardless — I typed that double negative on purpose because I have a physical reaction with I hear someone say it out loud and I am trying a new therapy where you confront your anxiety triggers — you have to admit that I rarely misspell a word and I would have no problem with you calling me out on a spelling error.

June is not the only month that sets me on edge. February is a close second because, darn it, Valentines Day is not Valentimes Day!

Where did that even start? Who heard Happy Valentines Day and thought, “Isn’t it Valentimes Day?”

Just as heinous as those people who announce that they are going to watch their child play volleyvall. Where did that come from? 

Bear with me for a moment while I take a calming breath.

There is nothing sexier than a partner who can spell words properly. I think some marriages would last longer if an impromptu Spelling Bee were held prior to the nuptials. You need not include big words, just every day words like: February or Wednesday or congratulations.

Judy Kucharuk is a lover of sarcasm, witty people and footnotes. You can follow her on twitter @judylaine

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