Judy Kucharuk: Giving Mr. Sandman the bedroom eyes

judy

Have you ever been ghosted by someone close to you? Have they dropped out of your life without so much as a “it’s not you it’s me” explanation? Have you stumbled through your day asking yourself, “What happened? Where did they go? What did I do?”

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I have. I have been ghosted by Mr. Sandman.

The ghosting was dramatic in nature. One night, I sleep so deeply that I wake up with deep creases on my cheek from the pillow and the next I am staring at the ceiling until 2 a.m. Sleep continues to evade me night after night after endless night.

“Sandy! Where did you go?”

Studies say millions of Canadians suffer from sleep deprivation and it’s affecting our concentration and our health. Apparently sleep deprivation can also make you fat(ter)!

Sleep experts say four to five hours of sleep a night are not enough to keep you functioning properly. The Martha Stewarts and Donald Trumps of the world who insist that they only require a mere four hours of sleep are kidding themselves. Sorry Martha, that is not a good thing.

I purchased myself a weighted blanket in the hope that the heavy bulk would settle me down for a full nights sleep. If you haven’t tried a weighted blanket, you should give it a shot — they are a divine. The only way I can describe the feeling of a weighted blanket is to compare it to the lead blanket that they place over you prior to a dental X-ray. It makes you feel so cozy and comforted in an “I am protecting you from radiation” way.

The first night I placed that weighted blanket overtop of my duvet was blissful. I was transported back to my childhood when I slept under a feather-tick quilt. Of course, I was half the size at that age and the quilt acted like a weighted blanket. I recall sinking into the mattress and having the most delightful rest.

Mr. Sandman was still ever-present in my life ensuring that I slept throughout the night and recharged my batteries for another day of going to school or playing late into the summer evening.

Those days are over.

I woke up Tuesday morning with the feeling that I had not slept a wink. Groggy and miserable, I stumbled to my computer to write my column in the hopes that maybe someone had the answer to getting back on the sleep train.

How can I lure Mr. Sandman back into my bedroom?

Judy Kucharuk is a lover of sarcasm, witty people and footnotes. 

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